jonie v. with a vengeance

in spite of what my fellow mousers believe (and they do have beliefs of their own on this score, i know because we have talked about it) i am a person with incredibly narrow interests. it is true, it is true. i’m sorry, i’m sorry. these are, in no specific order, the things i like/i am interested in/i care about/i think about/have meaning for me:

books.

okay, i’m exaggerating. there are other things. here they are, in no specific order:

politics.

that’s it. i’m serious.

wait, something else came to mind. here it is:

people.

i am interested in people. in fact, i love thinking about people. why, for instance, is Z reading agatha christie? there have been many mystery writers between agatha christie and 2008: would she like any of them? what other mystery writers write in the same style as agatha christie? are there any american mystery writers who write in the same genteel style as agatha christie? why not?

you see, it comes back to books.

and these are the things i’m not interested in, in no specific order:

• american pop culture, including television, music, cinema, celebrities, advertising, magazines, fashion, fads, frills, fan mail, youtubes, sound clips, websites, weblogs, and weddings;
• other countries’ pop culture, including all of the above;
• other countries, including their language, their culture, their food, their gardens, their monuments, their dances, their art, their museums, their landscape, their mountains, their beaches, their factories, their political system, their economy, their weapon cache, their political leaders, their songs, their athletic endeavors, their hats, their fashion and shoe style, and their dolls;
• art. it’s true. i don’t give a fig about art. really truly i promise cross my heart;
• world religions;
• traditionally female occupations, including gardening, cooking, child rearing, creating things (anything) with one’s hands, house cleaning, sock darning, button sawing, bathroom cleaning, and men pleasuring;
• beauty. when all is said and done, i really don’t care about beauty;
• local elections;
• how-to books and all books that are not novels poetry plays short story collections or about novels poetry plays short story collections
• technology
• music. it’s true. i don’t give a fig about music. really truly i promise cross my heart.

this is just the cream at the top of the pot. there’s a whole steaming potful of things i’m not interested in right underneath.

i feel the need to make this declaration because while i was sipping my tasteless and diluted decaffeinated tea this morning i caught myself thinking about books. i just started a new book last night, see, and the goodness of it suddenly and retroactively brightened what had been an okay but unexciting weekend. i thought: “think about something else, jonie v., you can’t be thinking about books all the time!” with great effort, my mind shifted to the current primaries. i spent about five minutes repeating to myself why i should vote for barack obama and why i should vote for hillary clinton and why i should not vote for the candidate i like best, john edwards. the reasons are, respectively: 1) he has a chance of getting the nomination; 2) she has a chance of getting the nomination; 3) he has no chance of getting the nomination. after five minutes i shook myself: “you can’t only think about books and politics!” i told myself; “there’s more to life than books and politics!” so i thought about my friend Z and agatha christie. and then i ran out of topics to think about. and then i decided to write this post.